Unforgiven Mistakes
by Kid-Flash01
Summary: PJ Liguori had been the victim of Phil Lester and his friends for two years. He hates him beyond words. He wouldn't dare say that to Phil's face, though. No-one in the school even spoke Phil's name - they were all too scared. Until the day the new kid started. Most people know him as 'the boy who dared to say Phil Lester'. They say his name is Dan Howell.
1. Names and Introductions

**PJ'S POV)**

This was it. Today was the day. The day my life finally starts. My first day of high school.

I wasn't sure which I was feeling more; nervous or excited. But I knew it was going to be an interesting year. It always was with me around.

Mum pulled up in front of the school. The same shit school I'd gone to since year 3.

I got out of the car ignoring mum's lectures about safe sex and how to prevent rape. What did she think this was? A stripper bar?

I walked into school doing what I do best – avoiding human contact. Then I saw _him._ The one person everyone avoided. That boy was _dangerous._

Maybe that entranced me, maybe I was just stupid. In any case, I still approached him that day two years ago. That was the day the bullying started. It was relentless and harsh, just like the boy himself.

You wouldn't dare to say that to his face. No-one dared to voice his name above a whisper. It hadn't been spoken in _years_ , maybe.

Until the new kid started school here. Dan Howell, they say his name is. Most people just know him as the boy who dared to say it, the boy who said ' _Phil Lester'._

"Hello, hello, Earth to PJ. Anyone there?" Louise grinned

"Huh" I said intelligently, as she giggled at my confusion.

"Sorry, what?" I corrected myself.

"Did you hear anything I just said?" she sighed, I thought before slowly shaking my head and gazing back into space.

I was confused, Chris and Phil hadn't approached me at all today. Maybe this year would be a better year, maybe they were sick of bullying me. I mean, it had been 2 years.

I could see Louise's mouth forming some kind of gibberish so I just nonchalantly nodded my head. Suddenly, she burst out laugh and my blurred vision, sharpened. I started at her, waiting for an explanation but she wasn't nearly done laughing her ass off at me.

"You, you, you" she attempted before bursting into another fit of giggles.

I waited…..and waited….and waited. Until finally, Louise had composed herself enough to spit the words out

"You just confessed to having a crush on Chris frickin' Kendall" she burst out laughing once again.

I gave her a hard look, because he was coming this way and I could see in his eyes that he wasn't messing around

"Wait, you don't do you?" she gasped, suddenly serious

"What?" I diverted my attention back to her

"Have a crush on him" she repeated herself.

I didn't had time to tell her to shut up but I knew even if I had, it would be too late. He was already standing behind her, smirk on his face. Louise suddenly realised and threw her hand over her mouth in shock-horror.

"Well, well, who do we have here" Phil mocked, bowing his head slightly, "Fairy Princess and Gay Boy".

His friends snickered and I suddenly felt angry. I wasn't gay but even if I were, why would it matter?

I stood up, finally ready to give Phil Lester a taste of his own medicine but I was pushed down by a hand. I looked up and saw the one and only Dan Howell looming above me.

"I know all about you, _Phil Lester_. I thought by now you would know not to insult people when you're _exactly_ the same. It's called hypocrisy." He leered stepping towards Phil.

Phil glared with such menace and hatred – If looks could kill, Dan would be dead 10 times already.

"I _know_ what it's called" Phil sneered, taking a step towards Dan, "but maybe you should take _your_ own advice before telling others to"

Dan just laughed in his face, he once again stepped closer to Phil. Dan was half an inch taller than him and he knew it.

They were almost nose to nose now and I could feel the sexual tension from where I was sat.

They both stood staring into each other's eyes when Phil started to lean in towards Dan's ear.

"Until next time, _Howell_ " he spat before sauntering off with his group.

Dan let out a deep sigh before sliding down next to me at the table, I looked over to Louise who had tears streaming down her face.

"I'm sorry PJ" she hiccupped, "I didn't mean for that to happen"

I smiled at her, of course she hadn't meant it.

"It's really okay, Louise, I know you didn't mean to. It wasn't your fault" I assured her, and a look of relief settled on her face.

I turned back to the boy sat next to me in awe

"Thank you. I mean, wow, thank you" I awkwardly laughed

He grinned, dimples and all

"That's okay. He was being a dick anyway. I'm Dan by the way. Dan Howell" He stuck his hand out.

"Hi, the name's Liguori, PJ Liguori" I grinned, shaking his hand.

Dan laughed

"Well, it's very nice to make your acquaintance Mr. Liguori" he winked, cheekily.

Before I embarrassed myself any further, Louise decided it was time to butt in.

"HI! I'm Louise! And you're really cool!" she giggled maniacally.

Dan looked a bit startled before shaking her hand and smiling.

Then, the bell rang. I had art next, which wouldn't be a problem except it was with Phil and Chris. Louise had English with a girl called Zoe, so I couldn't sit with her. I looked up at Dan.

"What do you have now?" I questioned hopefully,

"Umm, I'm not really sure. Let me just check my timetable" he stuttered, dropping a few pieces of paper.

I picked them up for him while he scurried around trying to find his timetable.

"Art!" he finally piped up,

"Okay, good me too" I dragged him by the arm down the corridor

"Bye Louise" I called over my shoulder, but she had already found Zoe and walked into class.

We walked for a while before I cleared my throat

"So Dan, are you any good at Art?"

He looked flustered for a moment, fumbling with his hands

"Yeah, I guess you could say that" he mumbled

What the hell was going on? One minute he went from this confident, funny, outgoing guy and know he was….like me.

"Are you okay, Dan?" he looked up at me through tear-filled eyes

Suddenly, I couldn't help myself

I pulled him into a bear hug, I don't know what made me do it but it just seemed like the right thing to do.

When I let go, he smiled at me

"Thank you, I needed that" he whispered

I gave him a kind but questioning look because _what the hell just happened?_

He seemed to understand what I was saying so he took a deep breath

"I'm new as you know" he started, "I left my old school because I was being bullied, that's why I stood up for you today because I know how that feels. I just. I have never seen that side of me before and honestly, it kind of scared me" he sighed in exasperation and relief.

I just hugged him again

"I can't really change how you're feeling about yourself right now, but thank you because you saved my guts" I muttered into his shoulder.

"But we _really_ need to get to Art now" I hurried, looking at my watch. We were 10 minutes late, maybe we'd get off the hook because Dan was new.

We walked in two minutes later and I went to explain to the teacher why we were late but the thing was, there _was_ no teacher.

"Hey Howell, remember what I was saying last time?" I heard a voice taunt Dan, I turned around and there he was, once again

 _Phil Lester_


	2. Fresh Start

**(PJ'S POV)**

"Okay children, today we will be designing our title pages" Mrs Frizzle looked patronisingly over at the class.

Did she seriously just call us 'children'? We may only be in year 10 but 'children'? _Really?_

"Now, make sure that you draw something that expresses your personality so the rest of the class can get to know you" she sighed looking bored already.

I looked over at Dan to see him hurriedly writing down ideas already. Oh right, maybe I should do the same.

I looked down at my blank piece of paper, maybe I should just leave it blank. After all, I'm not really anything exciting. I'm just your average teenager, with average grades, average looks, I'm just _average_.

The only thing I really feel passionately about is music, it's the thing that got me through all the days of bullying.

I felt like music was the only thing that got me, that bands like 'My Chemical Romance', 'All Time Low' and 'Fall Out Boy' were the only people who understood.

One thing for sure was that _Phil Lester_ didn't understand. He didn't get anything, doesn't get that some of us actually have difficult lives because of him.

Louise was another victim of Phil and his cohort before I was. I guess now Dan is going to be his new victim. Or maybe Phil will be Dan's victim. I'm not completely sure about Dan yet.

I was snapped back to attention by Phil's whiney voice,

"Hey Liguori, what are you drawing? Rainbows and butterflies?"

I sighed, I guess I still was his victim. Hey, maybe next year? But hang on a minute, why should I have to wait for him to change his mind? I shouldn't have to and I'm not going to.

"No Philip, what are you drawing? Oh wait, you can't draw, sorry never mind. Want a hand? I can draw some barbie dolls for you?" I retorted.

If I was going down, I was going down with a fight. I could see the steam coming out of his ears and he stood up with such a hurry his chair fell backwards.

"PJ?!" Dan whispered astonished at what I'd said. But nothing could change it now, and Phil was coming at us full-speed-ahead.

Thinking fast, Dan stuck his foot out as Phil walked, or jogged past. Phil went flying onto the floor and the room erupted into laughter. I looked down at Phil sprawled beneath my feet and being the dumbass I am said,

"Bow down to me, peasant".

The classroom went silent until I heard gentle laughter coming from Dan. Phil turned and glared at him which made him laugh harder.

"What's so funny, Howell?" he glowered,

"Just you, as usual" Dan grinned widely, his dimples on display for all.

Phil went slightly red; with anger or embarrassment, I wasn't quite sure.

"You know what, Howell. You're not even worth it" Phil stated as if it were quite simple.

"You keep telling yourself that, honey" Dan winked and I swear I saw Phil blush but he had already left before I could check.

I walked to my locker….by myself, Dan had gone to the bathroom. With Phil. Okay, I had no idea what was going on.

They seemed to have a 'thing'. Whether it was hatred or lust, I don't know but there was definitely something there.

"Hey PJ, over here" Louise waved her hands and made her way towards me through the swarm of people.

"How was art?" she panted, I guess for a little person that task was quite difficult.

"Quite…..eventful, I guess. Dan and Phil were at it again" I explain, wringing my hands, nervously.

Louise gave me a puzzled expression before it transformed into a huge grin and she wiggled her eyebrows

"Louise!" I whined, "Not in that way, you idiot". I laughed at her before we continued our journey to next class.

"They're in the bathroom" I simply said when we got there. Louise raised an eyebrow "Well, let's go then".

I tried to protest but she was already sneaking down the hallway, getting closer to bathroom each second.

She opened the door,

"Louise, this is the boy's toilet, you can't just" she cut me off by putting her hand over my mouth.

I sighed and kept my mouth shut as she put an ear against the door. We both looked at each other in shock and she tried to contain her laughter.

"Phil! What the hell are you doing?" I could hear Dan yell before silence. Absolute. Silence.

Did Phil stab Dan? Is Dan dead? Oh My God, the one person who was nice to me is now dead.

I barged through the door and the sight before me made me slowly back out. Out the door, past Louise and all the way to class. I could kind off hear Louise yelling but it all just seemed very distant.

I kept walking until I couldn't walk anymore. I slowly turned to her,

"I think I'm going to pass out".


	3. Bathroom Capers

**(Dan's POV)**

 _*earlier that day*_

"You know what, Howell. You're not even worth it" Phil stated as if it were quite simple.

"You keep telling yourself that, honey" I winked, before returning to my work.

Before long, the bell had gone and I immediately stood up, packed up my books and got the hell out.

I _really_ had to pee. I called out to PJ where I was headed before sprinting to the corridor. I got halfway before I realised I didn't know where the toilet was.

"Great, just my luck" I said to…uh myself.

I spotted Phil up ahead and continued walking, I wonder where he was going. I followed him from a distance until we came to a room. The toilets!

So Phil had unintentionally helped me, I guess I'll have to thank him later. On second thoughts, maybe not.

I did my business before exiting the cubicle. I stood at the sink and nearly broke my hand on the tap when I heard a voice,

"So Howell, what are you doing here?" Phil smirked.

"Uh peeing, like everyone else" I stated, why else would I be in here?

"You weren't by any chance following me, now were you?" He tilted his head to the side.

I cringed and turned slightly red,

"No, ha! Of course not" I laughed awkwardly.

"Yeah sure thing, Howell" he said stepping very _very_ close to me. I involuntarily stepped backwards but shit…there was a wall there.

"Is this something you do to every new kid, get up in their face?" I fumed,

"Nah, just the cute ones" he bit his lip and winked.

I blinked, and tried to control my breathing. _Breathe in, breathe out. Come on Dan, you can do it._ I mentally cheered myself for pushing him away.

He grabbed my face and I didn't know where to look. He pulled my face towards his, ignoring my struggling.

"Phil! What the hell are you doing?" I yelled at him,

Something wasn't quite right, I could see a mischievous glint in his eyes. He started to push my head away from his and went to slam it into the wall.

I didn't understand how important fast reflexes were until this moment. I ducked and kicked him in the shin. Phil doubled over in pain and I took this moment to push him but he grabbed my arm and I fell too.

Not on the ground, though. No, life couldn't do that. I had to fall on Phil, didn't I? Of bloody course. I stared at him for a minute before I heard the door slam and looked up.

I saw Louise's face watching in shock and amusement before walking off whilst yelling,

"PJ, stop! Hold on a minute!"

I gave Phil a disgusted look.

"Howell, I didn't realise it was this easy to get you on top of me. I thought it would be a lot harder, but I guess I'm just that irresistible".

It was in that moment I realised I was still laying on top of Phil.

"Oh shut up, you twat" I flipped him off before clambering off and walking down the hallway to find PJ and Louise

I straightened my shirt and ran my fingers though my hair. _Why did he have to be such a jerk?_

I saw Louise kneeling over someone on the floor, shaking their shoulders. I quickly realised it was PJ.

"Louise, what happened?" I gasped

She glared at me but quickly collapsed in another wave of sobs

"He just fell" She choked out.

"I'll be right back, Louise. I'm going to get the nurse" I panicked.

I took a few steps before walking back to Louise,

"Louise, I don't know where or who the nurse is" I scratched the back of my head awkwardly.

Louise groaned,

"Stay here Dan, I'll be back in a moment. Don't move a muscle!" She sighed before getting up and rushing to the nurse.

PJ was starting to regain consciousness so I knelt down and well…I slapped him. Probably not the best reaction but it worked. He bolted up and quickly glanced around before his eyes rested on me.

"Dan, what were you doing to Phil?" he gasped and inched away from me

"I fell over, PJ" I started to explain,

"What? On him? With your face that close?" PJ deadpanned.

"Yes?" I tried to sound convincing but it came out more like a question.

"If you say so, Dan. I really thought you were different" He raised his eyebrows.

 _I cannot believe this is happening right now. Again, the victim._

"Look PJ, I have explained what happened. I can't make you believe me but I thought you were different too" I sent him a disappointed look.

I sighed, this was pointless.

"Do you think you can stand up?" I offered my hand out for him to pull himself up.

He nodded and grabbed my hand just as Louise came walking down the hall with the nurse hurrying behind her.

She stopped short when she saw PJ standing up and the nurse came rushing through.

"Which one of you is PJ?" She asked, getting out her first-aid kit.

I pointed at PJ,

"I'm sorry ma'am but is it alright if I leave now? I have to get to class" I asked quietly,

She looked up at me, startled

"Yes, of course" she focused on checking PJ's temperature

I started walking away when I felt a hand grab my arm,

"I don't know what was happening in there, but Phil is bad news and you should probably stay away from him" Louise said caringly.

I sighed, I knew I shouldn't be angry and that they were just caring for me, but I couldn't help it.

"Louise, I've already explained to PJ what happened. Just ask him, I _really_ need to get to class" I hurried away.

I went to my locker to grab my books and check my timetable and behold, the next lessons were Science and English.

I was pretty good at English but I was absolute shit at Science. I was also late. Very late. I set out to find the classes and eventually stumbled upon Science.

I knocked on the door and the teacher looked up from writing on the whiteboard.

"And who might you be?" He raised an eyebrow

"Uh Dan, Dan Howell. I'm new here, I got a bit lost" I explained, noticing I was using my hands way too much.

"Yeah sure" The teacher said, already bored. _What is with these teachers?!_

"You can take a seat next to Lester" He waved me away and I internally screamed.

I turned around, and saw Phil waving at me from the desk. I rolled my eyes and sat down, making sure I was as far from him as the desk would allow.

"Howell, did you enjoy our little encounter in the bathroom?" He growled quietly.

I decided ignoring him would be the best but that idea was short lived when I felt his breath on my neck.

"Phil, why won't you leave me alone?" I muttered, knowing he was close enough to hear me.

"Because I always get what I want, and you're on that list" he breathed on my neck and I shivered.

"Seems I found a weak spot" He continued breathing and blowing on my neck and I choked back a moan.

I diverted my attention back to the teacher who was talking about atoms and the mitochondria or something.

Phil was clearly not impressed with my lack of interest as I felt a hand on the inside of my leg.

I jumped and hit my knee on the desk, causing people to turn around in annoyance and confusion. I waited for them to turn back around before looking at Phil

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" I glared at him but made no attempt to push his hand away.

"Let's play a game. My hand is an ambulance, when you feel uncomfortable you say 'red light'" he said cheekily. I wanted to argue but was in no position to do so.

He started moving his hand up my leg and got to mid-thigh.

"Red light" I hurriedly blurted but Phil kept going.

He leant in close to my ear,

"Ambulance don't stop at red lights".

 ***Dies from pheels* I just want to thank everyone who has followed and reviewed this story. I didn't have such a great experience on here last time and it's great to know that there are really nice people out there! Thank you!**


	4. Flashback Lane

**(Dan's POV)**

I can't believe that just happened I just stormed out. Walked right out of class, ignoring the teacher calling after me. Even worse, Phil ran after me. He apologised too, that's a first. It confuses me to even think about it.

 _*flashback*_

 _I threw the door open and jogged down the corridor, tears threatening to spill over. A tear ran down my cheek and I roughly wiped it away with the back of my hand._

 _"_ _Dan, Dan wait!" Phil came running down the corridor, panting._

 _I didn't wait for him. Instead, I picked up the pace and ran down the stairs before slowly sliding down the wall, head in hands._

 _I just sat there for who knows how long. Just thinking about…everything. The bullying, the tormenting. It never stops, does it?_

 _It comes in different forms and attacks from different directions but it never really stops. Sometimes I wonder why it's always me, why it can't be –_

 _"_ _Dan?" I felt a body sit next to me, I leant away from it._

 _"_ _Dan, I'm really sorry. Are you okay?" The voice said with genuine concern._

 _I peeked out from under my hands and saw Phil sitting there with quite a few of his own tears._

 _I don't know what made me say it and if I even meant it but it blurted out anyway,_

 _"_ _It's okay, Phil." I said shocking him, and myself. Seeing someone else in this state tugged at my heart strings and I just couldn't help myself._

 _He looked at me with hope-filled eyes,_

 _"_ _Really?" he squeaked, I nodded and smiled slightly. He reminded me of a little child who had just been scolded._

 _He smiled. A real smile. Not a smirk or a cheeky grin but a real smile. I had to admit then and there; he looked kind of gorgeous._

 _Even though his cheeks were tear stained and his fringe was covering half of his face. Maybe our imperfections are the things that make us perfect._

 _I stood up and he followed soon after. I wrapped my arms around his waist and nestled my face into his chest. He wrapped his arms around me and rested his head on top of mine._

 _"_ _Thank you, Dan" He whispered, I wasn't really sure whether he was talking about the hug, accepting his apology or something else but I took it anyway._

 _I pulled away and looked up at him. He brushed his hand against my cheek and wiped away the tear that had been running down my face._

 _I felt a shiver run down my spine, I started to lean in. I saw his eyes flicker to my eyes. His eyes were so gorgeous; they were blue, green and yellow at the same time._

 _"_ _Dan, what are you doing?" he muttered, eyes still on my lips._

 _I jerked back,_

 _"_ _What do you mean?" I whispered._

 _"_ _Dan, I like you. I do. But we can't do this. I'm just going to hurt you and I don't want to see you cry" he sniffled._

 _"_ _I trust that you won't, Phil" I gave him a shy smile._

 _I couldn't wait any longer, I stepped close and kissed him. I felt his lips move with mine, I felt his wet cheeks. We we're both so broken._

 _He pushed me away._

 _"_ _Dan, I can't do this. I'm so sorry" he cried before running away._

 _I sat back down on the floor. Now he's going to tell everyone, it's going to be just like my old school._

 _*ends of flashback*_

I only had two lessons left so I walked home. There was nothing left here for me anyway

Only the first day and I'd made two friends and lost them in the space of 2 hours. I kissed the school's bad-boy and was rejected and finished the day by skipping class.

This is going to be fun to explain to my parents.

I opened the door and called out,

"Mum, I'm home!"

She turned around the corner and smiled,

"Hi sweetie, how was your first day of school?" she examined my face

I shrugged,

"Oh" she sighed.

"Honey, what happened?" she cooed, rubbing my back.

I broke down, I told her everything. Everything. From the introduction with Louise and PJ to the conversation with Phil.

I left out the kissing part of course because…well just because but I think she understood.

I couldn't do homework either, I left my books at school. I was so screwed. I called it a night and went to bed.

Maybe I could fix things tomorrow. If not with Phil, at least with PJ and Louise.

 ** _Hey, sorry this is a really short chapter but I had writers block. This chapter is mostly just a filler (that's why it's so bad! whoops). Thanks for reading! xx_**


	5. Author's Note

Hey guys,

(Sorry if you thought this was a chapter!)

Sorry that I haven't updated in such a long time! I will definitely continue this story but I have a lot going on at the moment (school stuff, etc.) Holidays are coming up soon though, so I'll try to update more then. I am currently writing the next chapter so it should be up within the next week.

Thank you!


	6. Falling For You

**(Dan's POV)**

I didn't want to talk to anyone the next day. I had already made up my mind before I gave them the chance to explain themselves.

I sat at the back of the classroom, doodling on my book covers throughout each lesson.

My head shot up in panic when I heard my name.

"Daniel Howell, why are you not partnered up?"

I glanced around the classroom, only receiving icy stares from those around me. Maybe I should have been listening.

"Well, let's see if there's anyone away today" she huffed, running her long, manicured nail down the class list.

Her hand stopped moving and she smiled up at me, clapping her hands.

"Ah good, Dan, you can go with Philip"

I dropped my pencil, _are you actually kidding me?_

Of course this would happen to me. It happens every time, I swear.

I muttered under my breath, complaining about every aspect of the task. Christ, I didn't even know what the assignment was on!

I guess I'd just have to deal with it and show Phil that I didn't need him. That would quite possibly mean I needed the topic though.

I awkwardly stood, noticing people's stares following my movements. I walked over to PJ, who was of course, paired with Louise.

"PJ, what is the topic?" I gritted my teeth, hoping I didn't bring much attention to myself.

"Hi Dan" PJ sighed, a mixture of shock and panic crossing his face.

"You alright, Dan?" Louise placed her hand on my arm.

I nodded, my lips pressed firmly together. I knew I couldn't tell them what happened with Phil. It would not only ruin me, but Phil.

"You don't look okay, Dan. Are you sure you don't want to talk about it?" Louise questioned further, a look of concern gracing her features.

I nodded grimly again, refusing to answer either of their questions.

"Food Security" PJ suddenly acclaimed.

"Sorry?" I pondered over what that meant. Why would PJ suddenly say that unless…

"That's the topic" he explained, laughing slightly.

I went red as I nodded hurriedly and went back to my seat. I sat the whole lesson, taking notes occasionally but mostly thinking about my relationship, or lack of, with Phil.

I wasn't sure how I was going to do this project if I had to work with him. I still had, dare I say, feelings for him.

My thoughts were cut off by the bell. Thank god I only had one more lesson until I could leave this hell hole.

Everything was fine, I had the whole desk to myself in Science and believe it or not, I was actually learning a thing or two.

Then Phil walked in. Just my luck!

I internally screamed and glared at Phil with all my might. I quickly gathered my belongings, pushing them across to my side of the desk.

I removed my feet from his chair but in the process my foot got caught, pulling the chair towards me.

"Hey Howell" Phil glowered down at me.

I sighed, rolling my eyes. I guess we were going back to this then.

"Philip Lester, please take your seat. Do not waste anymore of my time" Mr Roy cut our greeting short.

Phil took his seat but remained close to me. I just stared down at my paper, I couldn't look up. I could barely breathe.

I felt his intense stare, inspecting and scrutinising my every move. I felt 5 minutes pass, then 10.

I looked up, ready to confront him but the words got caught in my throat as I realised just how close he was.

I could feel his breath on my lips and quickly looked away.

"It's okay Howell, I've been told before that I'm irresistible" Phil whispered in my ear, breathing heavily.

I pushed him away, but underestimated my strength as Phil let out a quiet scream as he fell backwards off the chair.

Phil sat on the floor, glaring at me but I couldn't contain my laughter any longer. I couldn't help myself, I lost it.

"Lester, Howell. Get out of my class and do not return until you have learnt manners and proper etiquette." Mr Roy spat, opening the door.

Phil picked himself off the floor, brushing off his jeans and strutting out the door. I collected my books and followed Phil.

I turned around last minute to apologise to Mr Roy.

"Sorry, Mr Roy. I didn't mean for" He slammed the door in my face.

I sighed and sat down outside the classroom. My parents were not going to react well to me being kicked out of class two days in a row.

"Sorry I got you thrown out of class, Dan" Phil sat down next to me, stretching his legs in front of him.

I faced him with a look of incredulity. Who the _hell_ did he think he was?

"Phil, I don't know what your problem is but until you sort your shit out, you need to stay the hell away from me. Okay?" I was so tired of him using me.

I watched his eyes turn cold as he stood up to leave. Was I too harsh on him? Maybe he has something else going on in his life?

"Whatever Howell, watch your back. Oh, and see you tomorrow night. We need to work on our… _project_ " he winked, swaying his hips way more than necessary.

I laughed to myself, amazed at the wit of this boy. He was such a douche bag but at the same time, incredibly funny.

I pondered over my plan, before suddenly making my mind up.

"Hey Phil, _wait_!"

 ** _Hey guys, sorry for not updating in ages but I'm writing again now and I have a good idea of where this story is going to go. Thank you! xx_**


	7. Scuffed Shoes

**Warnings/Triggers – low key swearing, abuse/abandonment**

 **(Phil's POV)**

"Hey Phil, _wait_!" I heard Dan yell.

I turned around, ready for the brat to try and correct me or argue with my previous comment. The kid couldn't take a joke could he?

I wasn't expecting when he said,

"Well Phil, why don't we just go to your house now?"

I shrugged and brushed it off, hoping he'd leave it alone.

I knew damn well that he couldn't come over to my house, I was just saying he could to piss him off. If he knew what went on in my house, he wouldn't talk to me ever again.

He stood there, sassily sticking his hip out and tapping his foot.

"Well?" he repeated himself.

"No, Dan, No. We cannot go to my house because I don't want you there" I spat, seeing the hurt fill his eyes and tears start to form.

"B-but" Dan tried to reply.

"Dan, honestly, I don't care what you're going to say. I have to go."

And with that, I turned on my heel, leaving him standing there shocked and hurt.

I sighed and put my earphones in, blasting Muse into my system. I looked down, scuffing my shoes along the pavement.

I tried to avoid going home, but eventually there was nowhere left to go, and I had to return home before I got in trouble.

I opened the door quietly and tried to run up the stairs to my room.

"Where do you think you are going, _Philip_?" a menacing voice echoed from the couch.

"Get me another beer boy" he yelled, making fists.

I hurried to get a beer, I didn't want my dad to be angry at me. I wanted him to love me.

I passed him the beer hoping he'd ask me to stay. A simple 'Hey son' or 'How was your day?" would be enough.

"Well, off to your room then. Do your homework." He rolled his eyes, focusing back on the TV screen.

I stumbled up the stairs, shaking with anger. I hated him. I wish mum would come back and take me with her.

I was sitting at my desk, head in my hands when my phone started vibrating.

I squinted at the screen as it lit up with Chris' name.

"Hey mate, where are you? I'm at the bar with the ladies, they're asking for you"

Oh god, I had completely forgotten about seeing Chris tonight.

"Oh man, I'm so sorry. I'm already home, I can't go out tonight" I explained, hoping he'd just say okay.

No such luck.

"Ah no probs. I'll pick you up in ten, yeah?" he questioned.

I had to think quickly, there was no way I could get out of the house without my dad noticing.

"No can do, I have a…project, yeah project with Howell that we have to finish soon." I rambled slightly.

"Since when have you cared about school?" Chris laughed, thinking I was joking.

"I don't, but uh Howell does and said he'd kill me if I didn't" I made a face at my own reasoning. Who would even be scared of Howell if he said that anyway?

"Alright, more for me I guess? See you tomorrow, man" he finalised with a chuckle.

"Yeah, see you" I hung up the phone call, letting out a breath in relief.

I sat, doodling at my desk until it was time to go down and make dinner.

"Oi Philip, get your ass down here right now" I heard dad yell

I glanced at the clock. It was only 5.30, I didn't usually start dinner until 6.30.

This better be good.

I clomped down the stairs, hoping he'd say that we could go out for dinner, or something exciting.

"Isn't it time you started dinner?"

"No dad, we still have another hour" I sighed, beginning to climb the stairs again.

"You'll bloody well make it when I tell you to. Who pays for your education?" he roared, slamming his hand down on the coffee table.

I muttered under my breath, deciding something easy and quick would be a good choice for tonight.

I started preparing pasta when the doorbell rang. I put the knife down and prayed it wasn't Chris, the bloody idiot.

I opened the door to see Dan standing on the porch.

"Hi Phil. I know you said not to come but I came –"

I closed the door in his face.

"Who was it, Philip?" dad looked angry that I had disturbed him from his TV show.

"Oh no-one dad, just a salesman" I lied, hoping Dan would go away.

He didn't.

He kept knocking, until dad got up in pure rage to yell at the 'salesman'.

I flinched as he swung the door open.

"Look Phil –" I heard Dan start, before he realised I wasn't there.

"Oh hello sir, my name is Dan Howell. I go to school with Phil, it's lovely to meet you." Dan stuck his hand out to shake my father's.

My father stood there laughing as Dan slowly lowered his hand.

"Dan, is it?" my father snorted, his belly jiggling.

"Um, yes sir" Dan nodded politely.

"Dan, never come back to this house ever again, and if you do I will call the police."

My father closed the door in his face.

He turned to me, his beady eyes filled with hatred.

"How dare you tell this person where we live?" he hissed, advancing towards me.

"I didn't dad, I swear. He must have followed me" I promised, shrinking back into the shadows.

"Who would want to follow you, Philip? No-one" dad bellowed and raised his fist.

Soon everything became flying punches and sharp kicks. I felt pain everywhere: my nose, sides, head and right arm.

I held on to the cupboard, I knew I wouldn't last much longer. I looked up, something shiny catching my eye.

I met a pair of brown eyes, watching in horror as I slowly slid down the fridge.

Then everything went _black_.


End file.
